There are times when we speak prayer – using many words and colorful sayings as if by doing so we will somehow impress God, (as if God were like humans who judge the wit and charisma of chatter).

Jesus said in the book of Mathew (6.5), “And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.”

God gave me a beautiful visual about prayer in looking at a newborn baby. The baby hasn’t yet learned the ways of this world, let alone how to use a language to communicate or form words with the tongue. When a baby has a need she simply cries. Then the parent is alerted of this need by the baby’s cry and goes to work trying to figure out what will soothe the baby.

With God there is no guessing game involved. Yet still, God hears us in a similar way. We can speak with our mouth, “God give me food.” And God will know if food is truly the thing we need; or if we ourselves are deceived in our own condition. Often times do we not crave food in an act of coping with emotions, boredom, stress or simply in unawareness of our habits? More often than not we know we’re unsatisfied but don’t know the root of our own issue.

Prayer is a language of the heart.

Scripture says in Romans 8:26;

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

In some of my most precious seasons, where I felt deeply connected to God from the moment I woke until I fell asleep peacefully in his word at night, my prayer sessions would be interrupted by tears. And for awhile I thought something was wrong with me. Then I’d go to church with my daughter and the same thing would happen to me during worship music. To be honest, I was embarrassed by this. Some people were clapping their hands and singing while others were awkwardly surveying the room and I was balling like a little child with a box of Kleenex while my make-up was pouring out over the pew. As soon as the preacher would start talking I was normal again.

Then one day the Holy Spirit said to me, “heart strings” and it made sense. When I feel God’s presence, it’s in the heart and when God is connecting with me deeply (like a masterful musician playing the violin) he touches me directly in the midst of my heart strings. And like a baby… I cry.

This was a monumental moment for me that changed my prayer life and helped me to get out of my head and even away from words. Yes, words are still running through my mind as I cry out and tell God all of my problems in my silent moments with Him but now this feels more like the initiation of prayer. In the beginning, I do all of the talking (like the person holding the microphone before the band starts playing), but when God enters the building all of that chatter leaves and my heart strings start vibrating to the cord he chooses to stroke deep within me.

I’ve been very reluctant to start a prayer mission in group settings because I’ve honestly never felt right about it. When people pray over me for example in past times, I’ve often found myself listening to their words with discord – not in agreement with some of the things they say. But then again, how could they know what I needed to hear. They aren’t God. Only HE knows the condition of my heart and anyone else’s for that matter. And often we ourselves don’t even know the root cause of our struggles.

Today as the Holy Spirit began convicting me to complete this page and open the prayer candle club, it was strongly impressed upon my heart to maintain the integrity of all i’ve learned in prayer. It’s a sacred space. It’s a private space. It’s a connection with God that is beyond powerful and takes place in the true surrender and seeking for a touch by God by each person individually. So, collectively, the subject and intentions are spoken – but the act of prayer is an inside job that only God can complete.

Our prayer sessions will be used to prepare, meditate and then hold a shared space of communion with God. The candles help us to do this (and even the visualization exercises that help us find a moment of silence (outside and within).

I’ve very humbled and very excited to see God work through this in me and in others.